In a short review on Monday, positive about the food at Ed’s Lobster Bar, less so about the rest, The New Yorker singled out the staff’s complacency and the restaurant’s “unaccommodating space.” Agreed.
When I walked in tonight, the long bar at which to dine had available only a spotting of undesirable single seats, recalling the body-bumping jamboree of the 1 train at 7 a.m. I strode purposely to the far end to survey the situation more clearly and got flagged down by the cock behind the bar (Ed?) with a “Can I help you?”
“One for dinner,” I said.
“You can sit anywhere at the bar,” he said with the open arms of a simpleton. No deal, barman. I didn’t want to sit at the bar. As a frequent single diner, I already knew the dozen small tables in the cramped back room were off limits. But the marble ledge with five stools opposite the bar appeared open and accommodating, so I took my seat there. As punishment, I was ignored by the floor staff for the next 10 minutes. No, they weren’t too busy. I’m a patient man and I’ve played this game before. It concludes with a server stopping by with an exaggerated look of concern to ask, “Oh, have you been helped yet?”
“Don’t mind me,” I didn’t say, failing to add: “I like sitting in restaurants, reading The Onion from cover to cover. I’ll be out of your hair as soon as I’m done with this Janeane Garofalo interview.”
Nah, I’m a nice guy, so I devoted my full attention to the server, not only because I was hungry, thirsty and wanted to place my order but because she was cute as a button and also wearing a halter top, the restaurant’s apparent idea of a nautical dress code. She pulled the classic Appetizer Upsell and sold me on the fried oysters, which arrived piping hot and crunchy, in an overally extravagant presentation, nestled in half-shells filled with homemade chunky tartar sauce and assorted greenery.
The lobster roll, which is the entrée at Ed’s everyone’s gabbing about, really is that good: chunks of fresh lobster meat blended with a smidge of mayo on an ultra brown-buttered oblong roll. For $23 (“market price,” according to the menu), it’s steep. I washed it down with two pints of the smutty porter, thick and bitter, with the deep taste and color of cocoa.
Ed’s Lobster Bar
- 222 Lafayette St. (between Spring and Broome Streets)
- (212) 343-3236
- Meal 22 of 52: fried oysters ($10), lobster roll (“market price,” which today was $23) and two pints of porter ($6 each).